It's about time! If I have to sit in an office working all day then, by golly, make the little urchins do it, too. We live in a fast-paced world where folks are junkies hooked to cell phones, Bluetooth headsets, Ipods, and SUVs the size of my college apartment. What's wrong with us covering the cost of extended care for their five-year old progenies?

Brought to you by the 2007 Montana Legislative Special Session who traveled into the annals of infamy by actually coming up with a state budget, albeit during overtime (there are no "i"s in team). The new kindergarten will only cost a few million to get started with continued cost depending on how many schools jump on board. Seems like a bargain compared to a $1.15 billion Stealth bomber and without the inflight going No. 1 or No. 2 problems.

I'm a little jealous of the day-long kindergarten concept, having missed out on kindergarten all together. When I hit five, my Mom had had enough and frantically tried selling me to roving bands of fallout shelter salesmen. They knew better (might have been her frothing at the mouth) so she sent me off to the only day long opportunity there was: first grade. Managing to excel, I regularly sat quietly in the hallway as most of my teachers didn't want to make the rest of the class look bad.

Such a compassionate new kindergarten program will help keep the youngsters engaged in strenuous edifying activities, making them less likely targets for street gangs, organized crime, or being drafted for the Iraq war.

At the heart of this all-day movement is the changing family structure including:

• An increase in the number of working parents. Check out housing costs! It's surprising parents don't ship pre-school kids off to work at challenging jobs like oil refinery technicians in Barrows, Alaska.
• An increase in five-year olds with preschool or day care experience. Kids are a lot more socially savvy -- ordering Italian take-out over the phone including an appropriate wine choice.
• An increase in the influence of television and family mobility. Shows like Desperate Housewives and Survivors have created a generation of kids who understand the world a whole lot better than I do (albeit, in a twisted and perverse kind of way).
• Renewed interest in academic preparation for later school success. Hey, the Japanese were doing this back during the 80's when they were kicking our gross national product butt.

The new kindergarten will provide the much needed opportunity for youngsters to achieve at a pace rivaling the new foreign trade challenge: Chinese assembly workers. No wait! They're first-graders.

Critics condemn the idea as an expensive social program/day care, requiring more teachers and school space. They're the same folks who complain about FEMA overpaying $485 Million to hurricane victims. Cheapskates!

Handled in an un-hurried, nurturing environment with special opportunities for mental growth, advanced screening and placement, and steroid awareness, all-day kindergarten can lead to success. Here's what a possible day schedule will look like:

So it's going to cost the Montana tax payer a little extra money. I'm willing to pay my part even though my kids, avoiding prosecution, fled the state a long time ago. Wish they would have finished elementary school.

Maybe the additional funding could be had by more creative gambling operations. I've played strip poker and found, with the right opponent, it to be very stimulating. Economically! What'd you think I meant?

Want a more complete and somewhat more accurate story on full-time kindergarten? Go to: http://www.kidsource.com/kidsource/content3/full.day.kinder.p.k12.3.html